Saturday night I stayed up very late watching old cartoons and thinking. Around 4 am Sunday morning, the tv programs got pretty slim. Normally I will stick with my old standard channel Boomerang. I actually find staying up late and watching 1950's and 60's cartoons to be very therapeutic. Its really the only time where I can zone out quietly by myself and just get taken back to another time. I can watch the Jetsons, Top Cat, Herculoids, old Batman & Robin and other super heros of days gone by. But unfortunately once you hit a certain time of night, really crumby cartoons come on like some dumb Land Before Time Cartoon and The Powerpuff Girls. Both being irrationally terrible. So I had to do some channel surfing. Luckily for me, I ran across PBS fund raiser. The slightly obese woman and her sinister eyed and pencil mustachioed counterpart were more or less begging for funds. I know I'm not the best looking guy, but I imagined that it was by no coincidence that these particular individuals had been selected for the job. I could imagine the producers with clipboard in hand, filling out time slots for individuals who would go on television to peddle funds. He would place these two from 3 - 4 am, knowing that this would be the one hour in which most people would be asleep. The producer would then select the token ambiguous and fluffy haired white guy and his forty year old (but aging well and very well dressed) female partner for prime time. Knowing that these two yo yo's were more than capable of tilting their heads, and giving you those million dollar coy smiles that make you want go through the trouble. Somehow they had the power to make you walk all the way to the bedroom, get you wallet, get out the credit card, wait for assistance, awkwardly explain how much you want to give, have them explain to you that for an extra (x) amount of dollars you can be a friend of PBS and get some crumby card. You explain that no, you just want to give like ten dollars, then you are frowned upon and the person on the other end of the phone can't seem to get down your credit card numbers. Then after making your donation, collagen face lady on tv starts ringing a cowbell for some rich doctor who donated five thousand dollars, and even knowing he did it as a tax write off, you still feel like a total ass. I personally ad no interest in donating, mainly because I'm too lazy, and also because PBS ripped me off on Celtic Woman tickets and I felt spiteful. So I figure they owe me, why should I donate. Then they showed the "FREE" gift with a donation of $125 or more. It was a box set of classic Motown hits. I must say, when they finally started showing clips and playing the old music I was totally drawn in. I was in no way going to pay $125 bucks for about $7 worth of cds from Bestbuy, but I did watch the program for a good 2 hours, more or less until the sun came up. There were songs by Marvin Gaye, The Supremes, Temptations, and all original footage from the period. All the guys dressed in matching suits, sitting on white cubist stairways to nowhere on dimly lit sets singing "It's Just My Imagination". That must have been a magical time. I imagined myself with my "Best Gal", riding the shoreline in my yellow convertible and listing to the Temptations and knowing how fulfilled life we would have together, and with that comforting thought in mind I finally dozed off to get some much needed rest.
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